Heya, gang! Our regular Sunday guy isn't around (rumor has it he read some criticism on a blog about SA and killed himself), so today we're going to look at some hidden gems of the Weekend Web! We've got three forums and some search logs to look through, so get ready – it’s going to be some killer fun!
I hate turtles, don't you? They're slow, they're stupid, and if you hit one at the wrong angle they can blow a tire, sending you and your family on a careening death-trip down the side of a cliff! And nobody wants that. TurtleTreasures, for whatever reason, loves them, however. So much, in fact, they crack their shells open and look for treasure. What a sad, sad world it's become.
In our first post we see "HMX_Turtleman" doing what he does best, moderating a forum about hidden treasures inside of turtles.
Uh, hate to break it to you, dude...
Never discredit "blastoisewatergem". His banter is funny enough to drop a supermodel's panties.
Yeah, they like punching birthday clowns. Who knows?
With a name like "ClOwN_kIlLa_420" you know it's going to be an informative post.
This guy doesn't seem very happy.
"MOM, TOMMY USED MY CLOWNPUNCHER ACCOUNT AGAIN"
Clowny, I'd like you to meet my friend Blastoise. He's upstairs playing Smash Brothers.
Shit's about to go down. HIT THE DECK!
Those crazy cats over at the SA Forums are still tracking down search logs. Here are some of their best discoveries.
You could have searched the last item first and saved yourself some time, buddy.
To be honest I really don't know what the hell's going on here.
And again, uhh...
I don't know the answer, but I can only hope it's "yes".
HOUSEHOLD PAINTING DISASTER
Finally, we have the Halo 2 Mods forum. What are they modding with? How are they doing it? Read more to find out...
Sounds like a hell of a game!
Good, someone needed to.
Watch out, dude! He's a ninja!
You're in a lot of trouble, mister.
Welp, that's all for now, folks! For more Weekend Web action scroll down or click the link on the right of the page. I'm Donny "Sock Weevil" Aluminum, and this has been Hidden Gems of Weekend Web!
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.