Parents! Afraid to turn your back on your son or daughter? Do the stare, unblinking, at a bare wall? Do they obsessively draw eyeless figures or scribble strange symbols? Have your pets disappeared mysteriously? If you answered yes to any of these questions then we want to introduce you to the opportunity of a lifetime.
Call 888-WEE-FEAR if your son or daughter is horrifying
In a Something Awful exclusive, we reveal the true state of Darren Wilson after his harrowing encounter with Michael Brown.
gee, sun, thanks for life and warmth and light. you totally did it on purpose and aren't just a stupid exploding deathtrap
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.