HaloDog69: Daaaamn, son. Look at that. Imagine that thing clapping.
Drewfus: I am getting crazy boners looking at this fine piece of bootycake.
HaloDog69: Hells yeah cut me off a slice of that I'll put the frosting on it.
Drewfus: I want to get up on that bootay like a drowning sailor climbing on a life raft.
HaloDog69: No way man you got to wreck that ass like a scud. Blow it up like a Madrid subway.
Drewfus: I would drive my train up that butt.
HaloDog69: Now you're talking!
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
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