This is Chase. Chase is kind of special. You see, he is one of the few people who wrote me an angry email, twice, and then realized it was all a farce. Come on Chase, what's wrong with you for Christ's sake?
Chase, look, it was all a joke! Please don't hurt me. I'm going to call the police. MARTHA PICK UP THE PHONE AND DIAL 911 NOW!!!
Oh Chase, will you ever learn?
It's okay, Chase. It's all over now.
On the next page there is something about something.
The singer dove off the stage and crowd surfed in a sort of reverse funeral procession where the person being carried is the only one truly alive. Touching him I felt religious ecstasy and started speaking in tongues and requesting songs that didn't exist.
There's no easy way to put this, so I'll tell it like it is. Bouillon is died. He went missing before the weekend and yesterday I found his skeletonized remains at the bottom of the #3 soup vat during one of my swims. I thought the cream of mushroom soup had an especially nourishing taste, and a lot more clumps of fur and skin than usual.
Were you enjoying your day? STOP! There is outrageous crap going on you need to know about!
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Truth Media seeks to lure out the brainless zealots mindlessly spewing words about faceless companies and products they have no relation to. Why do folks get so worked up over such inconsequential things? Truth Media is here, not to discover the answer to this, but just to make fun of them.