When the news cycle spins out every few months and reaches a retarded apogee, you tend to hear about Catholic housewives in Argentina or Kentucky discovering potato chips:
which very clearly contain the image of the virgin Mary:
I find it a little suspicious that Christians only report seeing Mary or Jesus in food products. Sure, it would be a little embarassing to tear open a bag of Cheetos hoping to have your faith reaffirmed by the powdery visage of Christ only to come face to face with Vishnu, but you'd still be obligated to hit #3 on your speed dial and inform the local paper.
Likewise, you never hear about Buddha presenting himself in an atheist's latte or a Muslim coming across Joseph Smith and his golden tablets on a plate of pork chops.
The phenomena of discovering powerful images in food is not limited to religious icons. Take, for example, this Big Kahuna Burger:
Look a little closer, and you'll find a familiar sight to fans of the arcade classic Burger Time:
Then there is this seemingly normal cake:
Which is, in fact, hiding the likeness of a famous video game character:
Perhaps the most famous example of video game food sightings came when Bernard Clemens of Newburg, Indiana paused just long enough before enjoying a Commun-Yums brand communion wafer:
to take note of a powerful icon which had presented itself:
Resident Evil 5
People were making a big deal about this game because all you do is shoot black people, but they were way off because you also punch and stab them. 7/10
Finally, a game that reminds mature gamers that the Wii is capable of showcasing titles that would be much better in HD. 8/10
Sonic And The Black Knight
Sonic fans have been begging for a game that gets back to the series' roots without the taint of gimmicks or storylines, and Sega has answered with a game about King Arthur where Sonic has to stop running to engage in swordplay. 4/10
Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
Huang shot first. 9/10
Over the last few weeks an outnumbered but brave group of men calmly used facts and logic to conclusively prove that women are ruining video games with their lustful object bodies. But there are other threats to everything gamers hold dear.
Sleeping with AC is at this point a basic human right. But if you're one of the doomed souls forced to deal with global warming on a nightly basis, here's an hourly breakdown on how to get the most out of your inferno hellscape of a bedroom.
We're spelunking through the movie catacombs this week. Join us, won't you?
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