And he is what? I NEED TO KNOW.

Family tree looks like a plate of spaghetti.

Good luck!

Special thanks to forums turkeys NipplesTheCat, FlossMan, Brolita, Mr.Smiley4, King Lou, Shoe of all Cosmos, SneakySnake, Aatrek, Helvete, ManifoldCuriosity, Samila, AstroWhale, cdcdu, Kal, Mooch and Earl, and Shazzner for their image contributions. Feel free to send me an email if you have any questions, comments, or suggestions for future Weekend Webs.

– Chris "Kewpuh" Binkley

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.