I feel sorry for today's children.

This girl needs to have her vagina sewed up as soon as possible.

I love making my daughter cry. It's so cute!

Her bloated belly is stuck on the shift key no doubt.

Oh no! I went to my GLS and she said I have to BML or GBI and I was like OMG. My DS spoke to my ILS and he said AME HLS BM. OLME BS DS CGT.

These pregnant cows are just so exciting.

Looking for a babysitter on the internet? Oh well, your funeral.

It definately has nothing to do with the fact that you're as big as a house.

More The Weekend Web

This Week on Something Awful...

About This Column

There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.

Previous Articles

Suggested Articles

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.