A:Because Cliffs Notes threatened to sue us. Suspend your disbelief!
List of Characters:
Sylvester: The narrator of the story, portrayed in song by R. Kelly. Recently had a one-night stand with Cathy.
Cathy: A woman who has had a one-night stand with Sylvester.
Rufus: Cathy’s husband, a pastor, who is secretly carrying on a homosexual affair with Chuck.
Chuck: A deacon who has been secretly carrying on an affair with Rufus.
Gwendolyn: Sylvester’s wife, who has been secretly carrying on an affair with James.
Twan: Gwendolyn’s brother, recently discharged from prison.
James: A policeman who has been carrying on a secret affair with Gwendolyn.
Bridget: James’s wife, who has been secretly carrying on an affair with Big Man.
Big Man: A little person who works as a stripper and is secretly carrying on an affair with Bridget.
The following sections contain explanatory notes and textual insights on Trapped in the Closet. There is a Summary of each chapter, as well as helpful commentary that illuminates literary motifs and stylistic elements within the narrative. Please keep in mind that there is no single correct interpretation of a complex work of literature like Trapped in the Closet, so your own interpretation of the themes and events present in the work may differ from the one presented here.
REFORMED HOG - Former member of the swine family, has now agreed to behave like a proper dog. Free to patient home willing to overlook physical defects. 555-2519
What do you do when The Dark Knight himself pulls a boner?
Available in Large, which is actually a Medium stretched out to appear bigger.
If you're in a tight spot, this is going to be really helpful (I'M JOKING. I'M KIDDING AROUND)
According to Dr. David Thorpe and "Your Band Sucks," the music you hold dear is actually unimportant, dull, and staggeringly awful. Everything from folk music to terrorcore-techstep is absolute garbage that has somehow fallen off the trash heap of modern music and found its way into your CD player.