Shybutfly, submitted by Jay. More bouncing icons than you can shake a stick the size of Nebraska at! Not only that but the page is laid out like Elvis with a groin pull, which is to say "sloppy, ugly and huge". Ooops, someone forgot to use 3rd grade spelling skills! Hey, this girl has a lot of maxims to live by, reminds me of Nietzche.

" It's unfortunate that there are gay guys in the world because it's taking away two good guys from the world instead of one."

Just because I beat up a few policemen I'm no longer allowed to carry a gun! Look at the problems I could solve in this world if only I owned a firearm with a large ammo capacity. That maxim is so deep too. Like, hey dudes, let me try.

" I'm not a big fan of those nuts that come in a mixed nuts can that look like garlic bulbs. They are really bitter and I don't care for them at all. Sometimes I think they are peanuts and I end up spitting them out."

Look out ladies, my charisma is 18 and my dexterity is 20!

P.S. - There is a guestbook for you to sign!

– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

Copyright ©2018 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.