Ann Arbor Hunk, submitted by Jabarkas. Personal pages devoted to "hooking up" were a very short lived trend back in about 1996. Obviously JB (or Bakeman, JimmyB, or J-Bake) who resembles a cross between Crispin Glover and some sort of moray eel trapped in a grease vat, never got the memo about the end of this trend. His site is loaded to bursting with inane and somewhat disturbing personal information and lots and LOTS of pictures of himself, his apartment, and the insane collection of videos he owns. Most of the pictures of this guy are much larger than they should be, providing you with painful detail on his always slime coated lips.
Interests: My primary interests are riding my motorcycle, body building, cycling, pool, computers, and watching/collecting movies. I also enjoy my job, jogging, bowling, computer games, programming games, mini golf, dating, romance, composing music, writing, hiking, playing most sports, fishing, hacky sacking, botany, x-files, pornography, doing crazy stuff on webcam, collecting mp3's, checking out cuties, Star Trek, reading sci-fi and horror, and chess. I don't watch much TV but I love watching movies instead from my collection of over 1,000.
Bold added for your reading pleasure. Okay, so we know old fishlips is a playah, but what sort of video collection might a man about town like JB own?
Something really embarrassing happened to me a few weeks ago. I was fucking a date and we ran out of condoms...at 4 am! She begged me to go out and buy more. I went to the only place I knew would be open at that hour, the grocery. I looked and looked but I simply couldn't find them anyplace! I was even starting to think they didn't carry them. Finally, I went up to some big guys who worked there and were taking their break, and said blushingly, "Um...would you guys...um...by chance happen to know where I can find some condoms?"
They stopped talking, looked at each other with surprise, then one of them was like, "Yeah they are in isle J in the middle...on a rack."
I was so embarrassed, my face was blushing beet red! I thanked them and started walking away when they broke out into laughter!
I did indeed find them where the guy said they would be. When I got back, my date was so thankful she practically jumped on me and ripped off my clothes!
JB, the "J" must stand for "Hilarious Anecdote"!! Nice video collection, by the way, I know all those episodes of Babylon 5 you taped off of TNT are sure to put you in a situation soon again where you will be "fucking a date" and then through a twist of fate you will find yourself "blushing beet red". It will more than likely have nothing to do with condoms and have a lot more to do with an unexpected reversal during a game of Magic: The Gathering.
PS - Check out this exciting comparison study of his "sexy lip photos".
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.
Copyright ©2023 Jeffrey "of" YOSPOS & Something Awful