Sunrise Computer Services, submitted by R-Lo. Do you need a web page designed in a hurry? Don't care about text placement, functionality, aesthetics or readability? What was that, money is no object? Well Sunrise Computer Services has the solutions to your web design needs. This "talented" bunch of go-getters know that quick and haphazard design is exactly what you're looking for and you've got the big-bucks to pay for it.
Traditional Web Site
$300/screen (minimum 3)
Quantity Discount Packages:
10+ Screeens: 10% discount
20+ Screens: 20% discount
30+ Screens: 30% discount
40+ Screens: 40% discount
Scrolling Text Marquis $250
Response Forms $350+
Secure Credit Card Order Form or Credit App $350
Those prices can't be beat without going to a fortune 500 marketing company and asking for a deluxe package! They're out of this world. Crazy SCS discount Al says everything must go!!! Tonight only if you order 50+ Screen web site you will receive a 50% discount; only $7500 dollars! Want to add a Marquis[sic]? The price jumps to a mere 7750! These deals cannot be beat without involving the dark lord Satan himself! And the quality! We will embed midi, make "great" looping flash animations, or use a Java reflection applet at NO EXTRA COST TO YOU!!! How do we do it? Because we work quickly and carelessly!!!
It needs to consume human tissue! It needs to speak to your manager!
Scourgelord Vilius Mandragore gave a speech from our shattered capital on Friday and we are here to fact check his claims about his million year empire.
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