Ecstatic Birth (thanks evil spiff) - Forget about all those horror stories you've heard about childbirth. It turns out that was just our culture telling women that childbirth is painful. It's actually the best feeling ever.
Ecstatic Birth is a call for a revolution, a revolution in the way we think about birth, and, as a result, the way we give birth. Ecstasy is not the absence of feeling. Ecstasy can be experienced by accepting whatever we are feeling in the moment and making a conscious choice to say "Yes" to it, so that the energy can flow and shift and change. Ecstasy is a transcendent, empowering event that sets the foundation for expanded creativity in all areas of life.
Say "yes" to your uterus exploding to five times its size! Say "yes" to blood and sludge falling out of your vagina. Shout "yes" to pooping down your legs as you wail with ecstasy and the baby squeezes out, savaging your birth canal and leaving you unable to feel sexual pleasure ever again.
"I thought the internet was all fun and games. Grow virtual plants on Facebook. Send email to grandma. IM friends with emojis," said the Stupid Ass Teenager, currently dying in an Idiot County hospital. "Never in my wildest dreams could I ever possibly humanly imagine that doing stupid ass internet shit in real life might get me mortally injured."
(Lips smacking, mouth full of peanut butter, glistening streams of peanut butter oil running down chin) "I'm full as hell, and I'm not going to take another bite!"
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