A briss is an important occasion for a Jewish family, during which a child is circumcised and given a Hebrew name. Naturally, such ceremonies put people in the mood to party, especially with a cheesy DJ with a laptop full of Paul Oakenfold MP3s! But KeysDAN doesn't only books brisses. Instead, he offers his services at bridal showers, pet celebrations ("opening our hearts to a new pet is a jubilant time"), and even "no reason, no season -- just party!"
A self-proclaimed "master of karaoke jams," KeysDAN also excels at futuristic Max Headroom-style stuttering. Truly this man wears many hats. ("Contrary to the common belief, the DJ does more than just push play. We are a personal assistant, reception coordinator, master of ceremonies, party host, dance instructor, and disc jockey. ") Also, he sells many hats with his face on them, along with similarly emblazoned buttons, magnets and framed tiles. Clearly KeysDAN can do just about anything, other than designing a Web site that isn't a complete laughingstock.
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
Play your entire PS1 library from a single SD card. But not your Brady Strategy Guides.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.