Today's Update

I want to thank my sister Renee from making the awesome Jasper pictures. If you would like let her know how much you like them, here is her e-mail.

People keep writing me asking why I hardly update anymore. Look, I don’t know how much clearer I can make this for you. We are through. I ended it in January and there is no chance of reconciliation at this point. Sure, we had our good times. Playing footsie at Applebee’s, climbing that banana tree, summers in Rome. But those times are over, you have to stop dwelling on the past and move on.

Don’t play fey with me. I know you have been seeing other writers like Pantsfish, Maxnmona, Acetone, Bobservo, and Docevil. You dirty slut.

I’m sorry I didn’t mean that. I don’t want this to get more messy than it already is. Let’s just be friends, okay?

– Reid "Frolixo" Paskiewicz

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    Pardon Our Dust

    Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.



    Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind

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