Zack: You sit Gruber down in a chair and put a cigarette in his mouth.
Steve: We need some info. Betty is going to do the talking and then I guess Walt can like write this guy's answers doing on a piece of paper. Will that work?
Steve: "What is this place?"
Zack: "A radio outpost. Ve decrypt and encrypt signals traffic."
Steve: "I've worked in like all sorts of secret radio places in England. I don't think any of them had a big spherical room full of dead bodies in the basement."
Zack: "So that's vat happened to ze Americans. Did you use ze crystal to activate it?" Steve "Maybe. Why don't you tell us what it is."
Zack: "It is ze final answer. The key to unraveling ze ultimate code. The truth to everything."
Steve: Yeah great so the truth to everything is dead bodies and a rave party that makes you crazy.
Zack: "Few can withstand the truth of the pattern."
Steve: "What do we do now? I said you said you could help us. On the radio."
Zack: He frowns and tries to figure out what you just said.
Steve: "When we came out of the hatch, I heard myself on the radio, warning me not to open the hatch. And then I said to find Gruber."
Zack: "Ja, you found me."
Steve: "Now what?"
Zack: Before he can answer, you hear a howling from outside the barracks.
I saw good men turned to mush in the wars against the soggies. Men much better than you, Mr. President. If you are going to take John Brennan's security clearance, take my security clearance too.
Forget beer checkers, beer chess and beer dejarik. Only these games are guaranteed to put you on dialysis by age 30.
Bonk: The Only Good Bonk Is A Head Bonk
We review every game from the last 2 months, plus all 21 SNES Classic titles
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.