Steve: There's no doubt who is in charge of Rifts.
Zack: Yeah, you told me right before we started what the guys name is and it made me laugh. What was it?
Steve: Dude that is Emperor Karl Prosek.
Zack: More like Karl Prosek, junior account executive at the company that makes bearings for robot skull dogs.
Steve: Don't get hung up on the name, dude. Look at him that is a boss right there. He is commanding.
Zack: Yeah, sitting on a toilet wearing a Spaceballs helmet with Terminanas out of Pajamas.
Zack: And why does the emperor of anything have knee pads?? He's literally the last person who should kneel ever.
This Week on Something Awful...
Pardon Our Dust
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
DEAR FURRIES: WE WERE WRONG
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Let's improve landmarks
Landmarks and statues around the world: old, boring and could use an update.
Make Horror Wholesome
Join the SA Forum photoshop goons in their quest to make horror wholesome!
Every Conceivable Way EA Could Screw Up Star Wars: Squadrons
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
About This Column
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.
Previous Articles
- Steve's Adventure Toolkit: Wondrous Treasure Generator
- The Intense and Strange Cover Art of TORG
- The Immortals Handbook: Epic Bestiary
- Steve's Adventure Toolkit: Rad NPC Generator
- The Mind-Blowing Cover Art of Classic D&D
