INT. ADVANCED ROBOTICS RECOVERY ROOM - Day
The room is full of all kinds of computers and sensors. A hologram of a robot frame and arms and legs is hanging over Steve's bed. A HOT ASIAN NURSE is looking at a computer screen next to his bed. Doctor Rebuilder and Georgia Austin enter.
Steve. Steve...it's mom. Can you hear me?
Steve stirs on the bed.
Steve, honey. Wake up. It's okay. It's time to wake up.
(sitting bolt upright)
NEW SHOE? NEW SHOE?
Steve kicks Doctor Rebuilder into a bank of machines and glass. Sparks shoot out. The Doctor is alive but hurt.
CAN I HAVE A POKEMAN? PICKACHU GO PIKA PIKA. CAN I GET MOMMY? POKEDEX FILL UP GOTTA CATCH 'EM ALL WEEOOO WEEOOOO WEEOOOOO I'M A AMBU-AMBU-AMBU I'M A FIRETRUCK! VROOOM!
Yes you are baby, you're mommy's little Pokeman Firetruck.
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.