I think the problem is that these people cannot find anyone to have sex with them and find themselves too repulsive to masturbate themselves.
I'll bet you a hundred bucks this guy was raised by a single mother.
Potential partners I can understand. But why do your co-workers have to know? Christ, shut the fuck up about your sexual orientation no matter what it is.
Fine! I'll write you up an entry for the website.
Asexuals: People who abstain from sex because they are either too ugly, too emotionally unstable, or too molested by their parents.
What a catch!
Ewww, bodily fluids!
MAYBE YOU SHOULD PUT FOOD ON THAT LIST YOU FAT FUCKING ASEXUAL SLOB.
Hey go for it. It'll raise the average size for the rest of us.
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
Dear god this was an embarrassment to not only this site, but to all mankind
Yes, there are finally enough games for a new round of One Sentence Reviews
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