Wink's World, submitted by Wink Martindale. Wink Martindale is to the Internet what Michael Jordan is to the Battle of Verdun. Wink Martindale's first modem was a 9600 Baud external and when he first saw it he remarked "let the kids hook it up Sandy". Wink Martindale writes beautiful poetry.

I Love Lucy, The Real McCoys
Dennis the Menace, the Cleaver boys
Rawhide, Gunsmoke, Wagon Train
Superman, Lois Lane
Father Knows Best, Patty Duke
Rin Tin Tin and Lassie too
Donna Reed on Thursday night
Life looked better in black and white.

A single couplet of Wink Martindale's poetry is better than ten thousand couplets from any other poet. Wink Martindale once read the Bible from cover to cover during a single sitting. Wink Martindale has opinions.

"In God We Trust" is our national motto. This is not some Christian, right wing, political slogan. We adopted this motto because Christian men and women, on Christian principles, founded this nation, and this is clearly documented. It is certainly appropriate to display it on the walls of our schools. If God offends you, then I suggest you consider another part of the world as your new home, because God is part of our culture.

Wink Martindale once painted a picture of the Virgin Mary's anus on the walls of the Sistine Chapel. When police tried to arrest him the Pope emerged from a secret tunnel, embraced Wink Martindale, and declared him the Vice Pope. Martindale was not satisfied and declared that he was the Super Pope, then flew through the roof on rockets hidden in the heels of his shoes.

– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)

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