In the amazing 1986 movie Link, an ostensibly domesticated orangutan reveals his budding sociopathic tendencies by microwaving a telephone. Apparently, even the most civilized primates, the kind that wear suits and smoke cigars, can't be trusted with communication devices. That's why Monkeyphonecall exists, to provide surrogate simian conversation for animal enthusiasts frustrated that zoo employees categorically refuse to "put the ape on the line." The concept originated in 2001, when an eBay seller promised to make "super monkey" sounds during a minute-long phone call. (The immortal eBay Card Game referenced this auction.) Building on the momentum of that novel solicitation, Monkeyphonecall charges a flat $10 fee for each order. Sure, people could make their own chimp noises into the phone for free, but the recipient might be able to detect their amateurish impressions. By contrast, Monkeyphonecall employs real professionals, like maybe this guy or that dude from Disturbed.
'We’re going to be in trouble!' Little Sister wailed, clutching her favorite book to her chest and sobbing. 'This isn’t fun like a story anymore!' But Big Sister was not listening, she was thinking. She grabbed Little Sister’s book from her and ran into town, yelling 'Help! A book made me and my sister hurt someone!'
I've been wanting to meet you all for the past few weeks, but I guess I cut an intimidating figure. I'm the new guy, with the cool job you've all surely been gossiping about. Yep, I'm the Lead Loremaster, and I'm here to enrich everything we do with much-needed lore.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.