Church Of Satan: The Official Web Site - I don't have anything against Satan. If people want to worship the dude that's fine by me. The problem is, if you're putting together a website in the name of the most powerful force of evil in the universe, you need a splash page that's a little bit more intimidating than a Flaming Lips band photo. Things don't get any better when you enter the website proper, either. I had no idea the standard "black background with a wall of bright text and red gradients around everything" template that GeoCities users love had Satanic origins, but I guess it makes sense.
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This Week on Something Awful...
The Men Must Pay for What They Did to the Footballs
The treacherous New England Patriots are guilty of deflating their footballs. We must punish them severely in the name of holy retribution. This transgression has been the biggest headline in the United States for an entire week, and it should be the primary concern of all nations.
Who the Hell is Buying Rolos?
We have used extensive market research to determine the average consumers of America's favorite rolls of caramel-oozing choco cysts.
TV Sports Graphics!
*Galaxies and stars explode, revealing the Sports Center logo as the center of the new universe.*
Make Sitcoms Worse!
'Sitcoms are so bad that they couldn't GET any worse haha.' 'Whoa buddy you're wrong... dead wrong!'
Pocket Products!
Not pocket-SIZED products, but actual pockets for your socks, underwear. Cover your body in pockets!
About This Column
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.
Previous Articles
- Magic Unicorns!
- Martin Luther King Jr./Harbor Medical Center
- The Academy of Remote Viewing and Remote Influencing
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