Earthquake Warning!
Submitted by basically everyone
Our thoughts and prayers are with Optimus Prime, Bulkhead, Arcee and the rest of the Autobots.
Critics Corner
"IT MAAAY DESTROOY LOTS OF ASS COUGH* COUGH*"
-ram98872
"This kid has a future in Cattle Auctions!"
-kukenango]
"You know how sometimes, SOMETIMES you bring your total A-Game when you're with a woman? You absolute best. She's moaning, her thighs clamp to your sides and her back arches with every orgasm. Your back has claw marks in it and her eyes glaze over and roll back
Well, the West Coast is getting closer and closer to the Mother Earth version of that. Somewhere, there's some forces at work that will savagely love her until a tectonic orgasm strikes downtown LA with a power unique to a woman's climax."
-Kriegsarschmann
This Week on Something Awful...
How The Olive Garden Hopes To Outdo Amazon's Drones
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
Do You Remember the 1990s?
Do you remember the crazy clothes and hair of the 1990s? Do you remember Crystal Pepsi and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Do you remember where you hid the box your mother gave you?
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty; Out of the Furnace; The Book Thief
It's still okay to like Ben Stiller, guys.
Axe Giant: The Wrath of Paul Bunyan
Dan Haggerty and Joe Estevez get grizzly all up in Paul Bunyan's bizzly!
About This Column
As you may have noticed, the most popular viral videos at any given time are amazingly banal, annoying, and cliched pieces of waste. It almost seems as if the internet naturally gravitates towards the worst possible Youtube and Google video selections. So it stands to reason that if the terrible videos become popular, then the unpopular videos must be awesome! We here at Something Awful present to you AwfulVision™, our own patented service dedicated to showcasing a wide selection of unpopular videos that apparently must be good! Welcome to Web 3.9. Welcome to AwfulVision™!
Previous Articles
- I jerked off my dad!
- *splap*!
- This is BIRDEEEEEEEEEMIC!
- Fucking AwfulVision! (How does it work??)
- You fudge with me, you fudge with the best!
