Edge of Reality posted:
Take off your clothes, and get in?
After shedding the outer layer, I have discovered a strange growth on my lower torso. What is your analysis?
Funky HotDog posted:
It's trying to attack! Attempt to fight it!
Attempt to fight growth has only made it stronger. However, it does not appear to be hostile towards me. It appears to be solid enough to use to club an attacker.
Growth noted as human weapon.
Baby Hobo posted:
The water is trying to kill you! Fight it!
Fighting is futile. Water is unresponsive to my attacks as well. Body odor disappearing.
Full Metal Jackass posted:
Leave water dispensing unit and clothe yourself with the fabric draping in front of it
Battle Bovine posted:
It looks like the other human you scared away left some pills on that shelf. You must consume them all. They will make you stronger
I have reclothed myself with fabric draping and consumed an entire container of small objects behind former human. Container labeled "Pep Pills".
EXITING WATER ROOM. FEELING AN UNUSUAL AMOUNT OF POTENTIAL ENERGY. PERHAPS IT IS AN EFFECT FROM CONSUMING THE "PEP PILLS".
BREAKING NOW: a story so dangerous that there are those within our government that might kill to keep it from getting out.
Ma'am, what if I told you I have the miracle of a lifetime right here in this briefcase?
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.