This week, the Something Awful Forum Goons attribute the wrong quotes to the right people.


"Great quality at low, low prices!" ~ Steve Jobs

"Creating intentionally stupid shit always cheers me up, second only to watching people hurt themselves."~ Johnny Knoxville

Xmas Future
"Can a nigga get a table dance?" ~ Stephen Hawking

"I'm gay" ~ Hitler

"Marriage is leading cause of divorce." ~ Hitler

"I come in peace" ~ Duke Nukem

More Comedy Goldmine

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

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