Would you like to be a paid writer for a popular website with thousands of readers? Then I can't help you at all. But if you'd like to be published in the crappy live journal section that no one reads of a popular website, then here is your BIG BIG chance.

Step 2: This time, don't use flash from a foot away.
To enter this HUGE VERY IMPORTANT contest, just send something funny to [email protected] and I'll take a look at it. The one that seems the most funny will go in my next Daily Dirt.

Rules:

Whatever you send can't be any longer than 3 medium sized paragraphs or 4-5 small paragraphs. If it's too long I probably won't bother reading it.

Include whatever name you want to be credited under if you win. If there is no name on the winning entry I'll just stick it into my next update and claim I wrote it.

You can include a picture that's supposed to go with it as long as it's not so big that I'd have to resize it and that it's not gross and also any other rules I decide to apply.

If no one sends anything funny, I'll either put up the worse ones and make fun of them, or more likely just ignore the entire thing.

This line is for administrative use only. Please do not write on this line.

That's it, ok?

– Joseph "Maxnmona" Fink

More Daily Dirt

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Advanced Level Sexy Catcalls

    Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.

  • Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    Zagat's Guide to Poor Person Eating

    The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'

Copyright ©2015 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.