You may be wondering "Where's Joseph 'Maxnmona' Fink?" Well, this Sunday, he's Joseph "Taking a Short Break" Fink. I agreed to fill in for him today and hope I did not ruin your post-Church Internetting!
This article was spawned by my fascination at the stupidity of electric football. Earlier in the week, the words "electric football" popped into my mind, and by the next morning I had written 2000 words about it. But I have to thank Pantsfish for his all-encompassing knowledge of sports. He helped me with this article, and I hope it doesn't show that I have not seen a sports game of any type since 1994. Also,DocEvil did the fantastic cover for Keith Jackson's fake game. Without the help of my SA buddies I would only have cold, lonely words to rub together.
SEE YA REAL SOON KIDS
A thousand years ago, dudes were dying from splinters, but now the wizard potion that cleans our light wounds costs less than a Dr. Pepper in 1994. I love this medicinal 7up.
U2 and Apple have conspired to place a U2 album into your music in the year 2014. You own a U2 album. And you can't get rid of it.
Ron Paul spins in his chair, trying to grab his decorative antique musket but Freddy gets it first.
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!