In celebration of Halloween, SA's resident fashion goblins Dr. Thorpe and Zack will be dribbling out a spooky Halloween-themed morsel of Fashion SWAT every day until October 30th. On the spookiest of days you will find a special Halloween treat!
Description:Fifi's never looked friskier!
The French Maid Pet costume includes a black dress with lace trim and a matching hat. Your canine cutie will look tres adorable in this costume!
- Availalble in Pet sizes: X-Small, Small and Medium.
- Includes: Dress and hat.
- Check out the rest of our selection of posh pet costumes to find an awesome outfit for your pooch!
Zack: Hell yeah, bro. I would kill for an evening to milk fun with that bitch.
Dr. Thorpe: "Ooh la la! A sexy french maid doggie costume is perfect for Halloween, parties, or guys who just want to fuck their dogs."
Zack: "Fifi's never looked friskier" It literally says that. They are literally trying to entice people to buy their dog a sexy costume.
Dr. Thorpe: Hell, you can see it in the photo, that dog knows it's in a lot of erotic trouble right now.
Zack: "I've always had this fantasy where my wife is at work and the dog maid comes in and she's licking a drop of pasta sauce I spilled on the kitchen floor. The back of her dress comes up and I can see everything. And I mean everything. Well, then I could not resist..."
Dr. Thorpe: Or maybe it's just that one last step for some people, like "dude, I never knew I wanted to fuck my dog until I saw it in that french maid costume."
Zack: "I totally understand, bro. I never wanted to fuck my dog either until I went on the Internet and purchased a costume to intentionally sexualize it."
Zack: "I had some trouble entering the credit card, but I figured it out eventually."
Dr. Thorpe: "I was a little confused by all that shit in the description about the vespers tolling for the agony of maid-dog, but whatev."
Zack: "Shit, they did charge me double and there was some sort of lobster suit in the box. I tried putting it on but I ended up looking like I was busting out of its chest and had all these legs dangling from my neck. I just went back to my usual President's costume."
Dr. Thorpe: You have to wonder how many people buy this costume for non-erotic purposes, and then you have to be kind of horrified with the figure you arrive at.
Zack: There is pretty much no good or wholesome reason to buy this costume outside of some convoluted Spanish Prisoner scheme.
Dr. Thorpe: It's like 95% dudes who want to do their dogs, 5% Playboy models who are dressing up as sexy maids and think it would be really cute to have a matching costume for their horrible little purse-dog who everybody wants to punt, except for all the dudes who see it in the sexy maid costume and start to think about maybe having sex with it.
Zack: You know Bill Maher has fucked at least one Playboy model's dog in a maid costume.
Zack: His 50 minute spiel on Christianity being "for fucking retards" fell flat on the Tiffany from Kansas with the double D implants, so he crept back into the grotto with the sauciest purse dog he could waylay. Time to party with frisky Fifi.
Dr. Thorpe: Shit, I bet he keeps one in his glove compartment and fucks it at slop lights.
Zack: He fucks it very quickly and very smugly.
Dr. Thorpe: And he's such a dick that you feel like an asshole for agreeing with him about how much Republicans suck and how sexy the dog is
Dr. Thorpe: Well, Zack, all these dogs sure have been baffling, amusing and sexually stimulating, but that's just beginning, isn't it?
Zack: That's right, Dr. Thorpe. Tomorrow we'll be delving into the eye of the emotional damage hurricane to see what an assortment of frightful fiends have planned for Halloween.
Forget Target or Best Buy, if you want deals this Black Friday you can't do better than smoking massive, mind-melting quantities of DMT.
A reluctant family is forced to welcome a non-human participant to Thanksgiving dinner.
You cant go around life being smart in an unconventional way, it could change the world.
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!