I can't believe a year has passed already. When I first started writing for Something Awful, I thought I'd immediately run out of ideas, which seems so weird now because I'm usually wrong on predictions but I was spot on with that one.
Thank you for reading my articles, thank you for all the nice emails that made me want to continue, and thank you for all the mean ones that made me want to get better (and die.)
Here's my first update. It's about me having butt worms. It is one of my favorites. Too bad the formatting is terrible.
Sleeping with AC is at this point a basic human right. But if you're one of the doomed souls forced to deal with global warming on a nightly basis, here's an hourly breakdown on how to get the most out of your inferno hellscape of a bedroom.
Some of the Internet's most veteran anatomy experts convened to discuss the stolen nude photos of Jennifer Lawrence and other beautiful celebrities.
We're spelunking through the movie catacombs this week. Join us, won't you?
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!