As of today, I will no longer be a regular writer for the front page. The board of directors have decided in all their wisdom that my contribution to the site would be better served "on the streets", rapping with the kids about gang violence, and saving small towns from rambunctious motorcycle gangs, rather than sitting around the home office and causing a mess in the break room.
Thus I am hitting the road in 2006 as a representative of SA on a grassroots program to spread democracy and get into all kinds of crazy adventures, like Renegade. Every month I will be doing one front page feature, reporting on the progress being made by my travels across this great nation. Our mission is to heal this country during this time of economic struggle and foreign wars with the power of laughter and fart jokes.
I won't let my fans and the good people of America down! God bless.
A special thanks to Humanity for his patriotic artistic skills.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
Today's viral teen news beat, brought to you by Mike from the Internet!
Ignore the hype. Find out how these games will likely go right or wrong.
Doing some reps on the water bottle huh. I prefer bench press myself. Just kidding - stay hydrated.
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!