Today's update was a sloppily formatted mess which may or may not have been funny. Looking back on it, it has a lot of Amber Alert overtones. My bad.
I thought Prussian Blue would be the perfect topic for a frontpage update, because they're terrifying and absurd. I underestimated how hard it would be to make something that's already absurd funny. Again, the formatting is really a huge mess and I'm sorry if I damaged your eyes. I'm the worst. If you want more information on the horror that is Prussian Blue, here are a few links.
Did Louis C.K. jerk off in front of two female comics? And why are these ladies squandering an opportunity to learn from a comedy legend?
Elliot said my breakup must have been due to the sweater curse, an unexplained phenomenon where anyone who gives their significant other a hand-knit sweater gets dumped. The only way to break the curse, Elliot said, was to destroy the sweater.
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!