Zack: Alright, I know you didn't read it again, but seriously I want to hear you defend a 300-word argument for picking metric measurements when playing the game.
Steve: I'm not defending that. I prefer to use nothing but TV measurement analogies. Football fields, VW Bugs, Empire State Buildings, school buses and grains of rice.
Zack: The extraterrestrials section mentioned above is where we learn that the xenoborgs are coming to earth to steal our resources and loot our cities of works of art and durable goods. Aliens traveled through alternate dimensions and the immensity of space to commit a home invasion on our planet.
Steve: They're giant bugs. What do they know about art?
Zack: They know what they like.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
Sorry about the blurry photo. I was lunging at my phone, yelling at it to take a clear picture. It's the only image of me that exists. I'd take another picture for you, but I'm in the middle of a rigorous trampoline session.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.