Zack: Alright, I know you didn't read it again, but seriously I want to hear you defend a 300-word argument for picking metric measurements when playing the game.
Steve: I'm not defending that. I prefer to use nothing but TV measurement analogies. Football fields, VW Bugs, Empire State Buildings, school buses and grains of rice.
Zack: The extraterrestrials section mentioned above is where we learn that the xenoborgs are coming to earth to steal our resources and loot our cities of works of art and durable goods. Aliens traveled through alternate dimensions and the immensity of space to commit a home invasion on our planet.
Steve: They're giant bugs. What do they know about art?
Zack: They know what they like.
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.