Zack: Or carry one flashlight.
Steve: An x-ray flashlight?
Zack: Okay, maybe that one is sort of cool, but it's not worth getting rid of your balls over. Not even if you get the most phallic laser rifle I've ever seen.
Steve: Techno sunglasses dude. You can like watch the big game and look through a babe's shirt and calculate where to shoot a laser blast to collapse a bridge onto a bug legion.
Zack: Sure and after 20 years, after the bugs win and enslave all of mankind, the surviving cyborg commandos find out the techno glasses caused brain tumors.
Steve: Their chest is an x-ray machine.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.