Steve: I will die before you convince me this thing isn't totally 100% heavy metal kick ass.
Zack: He does look pretty kickass.
Steve: I know, right? He looks like he could step out of some sinister alcove and punch the brains out of some dude's skull.
Zack: Yeah, he does, too bad looks can be deceiving. You see that text about Zodar not talking? That's because Zodar is a bullshit Dungeon Master tool for making sure the party survives encounters. As you and I both know the purpose of the DM is not to hand-hold and protect the "gaming experience," it's to brutally murder the entire party as diabolically and violently as possible.
Steve: I think I remember that from the intro text in the DMG. Still, I don't care. Zodar looks like a badass, he has badass stats, even the fact that he never says anything is cool. Like a cowboy.
Zack: The Good, the Bad and the Mary Sue.
Ferguson's long arm of the law laments the latest cutback.
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.