Steve: Meat Elf.

Zack: I think I saw this guy as a 3D hologram in the middle of a pyramid of eyes on a Tool album cover.

Steve: Hello gentlefolk, I am Meat Elf.

Steve: Ich bin Meat Elf. Don't mind the puke.

Zack: No lips, sorry about that.

Steve: Haaaauuggghhh. Just meated in from under dark and boy are my meats tired.

Zack: First they whipped my skin off, then they took my alignment. Now I'm taking...revenge.

Steve: Revenge is a dish best served meat.

Zack: "Where are they, Kowalski!? Where are the Kiaransalee brothers!?"

Steve: "It's still me. I'm still the same elf I was on the inside, but now my inside is outside."

Zack: Horfk! *wipes mouth* "There's more where that came from."

Steve: This is pretty much the plot of Machete I think, only that withered Mexican dude had skin.

Zack: That's debatable.


More WTF, D&D!?

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.