Steve: Meat Elf.
Zack: I think I saw this guy as a 3D hologram in the middle of a pyramid of eyes on a Tool album cover.
Steve: Hello gentlefolk, I am Meat Elf.
Steve: Ich bin Meat Elf. Don't mind the puke.
Zack: No lips, sorry about that.
Steve: Haaaauuggghhh. Just meated in from under dark and boy are my meats tired.
Zack: First they whipped my skin off, then they took my alignment. Now I'm taking...revenge.
Steve: Revenge is a dish best served meat.
Zack: "Where are they, Kowalski!? Where are the Kiaransalee brothers!?"
Steve: "It's still me. I'm still the same elf I was on the inside, but now my inside is outside."
Zack: Horfk! *wipes mouth* "There's more where that came from."
Steve: This is pretty much the plot of Machete I think, only that withered Mexican dude had skin.
Zack: That's debatable.
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
Do you remember the crazy clothes and hair of the 1990s? Do you remember Crystal Pepsi and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Do you remember where you hid the box your mother gave you?
It's still okay to like Ben Stiller, guys.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.