Steve: I didn't realize there was a Hebrew version of Mahjong.
Zack: Alright, Wizards of the Coast, I have a new rule for you: the length of boring rules text on a card must be inversely proportional to the excellence of the artwork. If the rules wouldn't fit in a tweet you'd better not pair the text with something that looks like a domino with a grocery list chiseled into it by elves.
Steve: How long should it be for this one?
Zack: One word. Like "bands" or "mountainwalk" or something. You get something like the original Stasis artwork that's boring and it looks like it was painted by a learning-disabled child then you get one letter.
Zack: No, half a letter. I want to see part of an "S" cut off like a printing error.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
Sorry about the blurry photo. I was lunging at my phone, yelling at it to take a clear picture. It's the only image of me that exists. I'd take another picture for you, but I'm in the middle of a rigorous trampoline session.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.