Steve: Looks like you messed up again, dude. The Peryton is real.
Zack: You know, come to think of it I might have seen a CNN report about an eagle with the head of a deer that casts a human shadow and eats hearts. That sounds right up Rick Sanchez's alley.
Steve: Don't kid around, there are real accounts of this thing attacking people.
Zack: You're right, this is extremely important and serious. Who was attacked by this thing?
Zack: It's always sailors.
Steve: There are accounts in history. I looked it up on Wikipedia and it says a rabbi was attacked.
Zack: He should have fought it off with his golem.
Steve: It says they were responsible for the fall of Rome.
Zack: Et tu, Peryton?
Zack: Does whatever insane version of Wikipedia you're reading mention if Perytons were responsible for our current economic crisis?
Steve: Don't be ridiculous. Perytons don't do investment banking. They're evil lost souls trapped in monster bodies.
Zack: Sounds like an investment banker to me.
Your lair. Maybe you lure victims to it, maybe you hide in it between killings, or maybe you haunt it 24/7 because you’re tragically confined by a curse. Whatever the situation, for most of us monsters, a living/un-living space is an important part of our identities. In this column, Monstergeddon award winners share their lair tips and techniques!
Works great on my child, who hasn't barked at all for as long as she's worn the apparatus. When she turns three, we will remove it for a trial period.
Try not to break your console while I try not to break my cyber brain.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.