Steve: No, not Timothy Bradstreet!
Zack: This is the cover of a totally serious book. I would go so far as to say it's an overly serious book. Like a funeral home's guest book with stats for making monsters out of shadows.
Steve: You know when you press your thumb on the little screen of a calculator and the numbers all fudge up and it leaves an impression of your thumb?
Steve: Oh, alright.
Zack: Are you saying this guy is a calculator?
Steve: I was talking about his head.
Zack: He's a human calculator.Steve: Obviously not he's a vampire. But I bet being immortal they are pretty good at math.
The treacherous New England Patriots are guilty of deflating their footballs. We must punish them severely in the name of holy retribution. This transgression has been the biggest headline in the United States for an entire week, and it should be the primary concern of all nations.
We have used extensive market research to determine the average consumers of America's favorite rolls of caramel-oozing choco cysts.
Zack Parsons, Steve "Malak" Sumner, and friends tackle bizarre role playing game products that make them wonder, "What the fuck!?" From the early days of Gygax to contemporary role playing games, none will be spared.