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Dr. Thorpe: Making your own crappy porn about cartoon characters is one thing; it hurts nobody, so go right ahead. But destroying real porn in the process? Sorry, friend, you've gone too far.

Zack: I am going to pour a forty out on the street tonight for my homeboy lesbian nipple chew, cut down in his prime by some stray Betty Boop fan art.

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About This Column

Fashion SWAT... the fashion industry is obsessed with impracticality. We know that what designers create was never meant to be worn by the grimy masses, but that doesn't somehow diminish how ridiculous many of these costumes are. Make no mistake, they are costumes, and like a Halloween prize pageant we will turn our discerning gaze on the grievous fashion misfires of Paris, Milan, and New York. We're not pulling any punches, and we're definitely not interested in making any friends. We're Joan Rivers without Melissa Rivers to temper our screeching. We're the Fashion Police in jack boots. We are Fashion SWAT.

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