Epilogue - The Coldest of Wars
Daring had just finished having sex with Maude again, this time with her sister too, when the door to the farm house was flung open. In walked none other than the hero of communism, complete with cape and suit of armor.
"You may have defeated Hitler and Hirohito but you will never best me you capitalist pig dog!" Stalin drew a saber, honorably throwing another saber to Sergeant Armstrong. "En Garde!"
A sword fight happened! There was a lot of clanging and jumping around and the girls screamed and ran out wrapped in sheets while Stalin and Armstrong jumped on the bed and fought each other and then they jumped on the table knocking food everywhere. It was a mess!
"Uncle Sam believes in the Bible and capitalism you heathen, and I'm going to show you why!"
"I dare you to try American fool!"
Then after a while they sort of got tired of sword fighting and decided to take a nap. Then Stalin had to go because it was late and his wife would be mad if he came home after she was already in bed. Stalin and America's Sergeant Armstrong agreed to disagree.
YOUNG AND USELESS - Meek dog lacks the age and experience necessary for the grim task at hand. Will trade for a dog unshackled from morality, and willing to do what needs to be done. 555-1299
This is not my jury summons!
Featured articles and columns that don't fit anywhere else on Something Awful.