Bareback Rodeo posted:
There was a girl that I had a crush on in my early school days. She was incredibly pretty, and I'd always try to borrow things off her in class. Once I asked her for a pen, and then I sat next to her and wrote out a poem that I had made up earlier. I thought that she'd think I was really creative and brilliant or something (I even found out when her birthday was and included that in the poem) but she just laughed at me and then made fun of me in front of everyone. I hated her for that.
Anyway, a week ago she was beaten up and raped.
Jeez, how do you people manage to cheat so much? I only managed to do it because of sheer ignorance and inexperience, but that's later.
When I was cheated on: There was a girl I worked with, and for all intents and purpouses, we were dating without actually delcaring it. I was tired of it because we only managed to go on one date, and she was always blowing me off to go to raves. I had figured out what was going on because one day, I showed up at her apartment, one of her 3 roomates (1 bedroom apartment), let me in, I waited for her for over an hour to show up before I left. SHe told me that she had gone home with some twins after a rave.
When I "cheated:" I was in a Yahoo chat room, I met two girls that didn't know each other on it in the same night. Things were going well on both fronts and we hung out a few times. Figuring out that I was dating both of them, I decided that I had to do something. Being an inexperienced retard, I told both of them at the same time online. Both of them turned on me.
Sadly, this is also the extent of my dating experience.
(anime) Conventions have as many "hot chicks" as pretty much anywhere else. That is, very very few.
However, if you get turned on by meeting chicks that are into the same things you are, then the related convention is totally where one would go to pick up chicks. Paris Hilton? Pamela Anderson? Sure, I'd love to blast them with my fetid demon seed.
Give me a plain-jane nerdy girl who's nerdy about the same things I'm nerdy about. That's an order of magnitude better than a vapid blonde bombshell.
I can never be polyamorous again.
I was, I thought, in a polyamorous relationship. I was pretty much best friends with his wife. I visited them twice and I watched their son and I dyed her hair and we all went to a ren faire and there was... other stuff, as well. This is not meant to me an "omg i had sex" post, trust me. She saw us snuggling on the couch and the air bed. She had no problem with us holding hands. I thought she knew.
The part that confuses me the most is that I know that she's his world. On the day that this all went down, he went an hour out of his way to get her the pizza she likes. This is not an uncommon occurance. He regularly attempts to move heaven and earth in an attempt to make her happy. I can't understand how this is the same person who has sat with me for hours on the phone and helped me through emotional bullshit when I was off of my antidepressants.
...I miss her. I was getting ready to tell her that I was in love with her, too. I even bought her a pretty little artisan necklace to cement the message.
I was surprised when I learned that my fiance didn't want to rip this guy's lungs out. However, his reasoning was valid: "I don't think there's anything I can do to him that's worse than what he's done to himself."
Tucker Carlson's idiot brother just called New York mayor Bill de Blasio's spokeswoman a "LabiaFace."
Hey, have you guys ever seen a picture of a cat before? Well, guess what. It’s your lucky day, because I’m mixing the concept of a picture of my cat with the concept of the Internet!
The Something Awful Forums are, by far, the greatest and most entertaining community on the internet. From the Comedy Goldmine to Photoshop Phriday, our forums are pretty much the lone island refusing to be engulfed by the sea of stupidity that is the internet. While sections like the Comedy Goldmine and Photoshop Phriday showcase the intentionally hilarious forum creations, we've failed to reveal the coin's flip side. The Great Goon Database is a depository of unintentionally amusing Something Awful Forum quotes demonstrating the darker side of SA. Special thanks to Goon "LittleJoe" for collecting and sorting these gems.