Not Asking a Lot with Tom "Moof" Davies

Livestock: moof i would like to win 8 million dollars in the lottery i do not think that is asking too much
Moof: that is asking a lot (it is asking for eight million dollars)
Livestock: i know but if i were greedy i'd say 56 million or some odd number
Livestock: i am saying only 8
Livestock: and with that 8 i would live comfortably for the rest of my days and never bother a soul
Livestock: i would pay off my debts, and make the world brighter
Livestock: so 8 million is a fair amount
Moof: hehehe okay if i can have 2 million of it
Livestock: then i will ask for 10 million
Livestock: i do not think that is too much
Moof: no that is too much
Moof: you can have 6 million
Moof: i will have 2 million
Livestock: moof i do not like this plan and what do you need 2 million for anyway
Moof: i just want a little house
Moof: and a dog
Moof: that is all i want
Livestock: i do too but i want my house to be a penthouse with a view and i want my dog to be a yacht
Livestock: i don't really like sailing but i want to run it aground on a populated beach
Moof: :O
Livestock: then i will climb out and said "the ocean is so boring!"
Livestock: then i will set the yacht ablaze
Livestock: and walk away satisfied
Livestock: a victor over the sea
Moof: how will you get home
Livestock: i will have a helicopter waiting
Livestock: people will say "that man is living comfortably and never bothering a soul"
Moof: i dont want a helicopter and a boat
Moof: just a little house and a nice dog
Livestock: okay moof i will buy you a little house and a dog when i have 8 million, but i will want to maintain ownership of both
Moof: will you meddle in their affairs or let us be
Livestock: you will sign a contract and agree to follow all edicts great and small
Moof: that sounds like meddling to me
Livestock: should you not once, the dog disappears
Livestock: should you not again
Livestock: the house disappears
Moof: where does the dog go :(
Livestock: should you not a third, then you will disappear
Livestock: and find yourself in the house with the dog
Livestock: on a deserted island
Moof: oh okay :)
Livestock: i will have disappeared all three of you
Moof: that is not so bad
Livestock: and you will never hear from me again
Livestock: but moof
Livestock: the contract will be void
Livestock: so you will live without purpose
Moof: nope i will be happy
Livestock: moof the island will be alcatraz
Moof: alcatraz is in a good location
Moof: close to the city but far enough away to be quiet
Livestock: moof i will hire a man to fly a helicopter over your house for 4 hours each day
Moof: :C
Moof: livestock we do not have a deal
Moof: i will make my own way in this world

– Josh "Livestock" Boruff (@Livestock)

More Mooflogs

This Week on Something Awful...

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.