"Can I have new fries?"
"Welp, fine" you say, turning around. Looks like you have to burn this place to the ground.
You watch the place collapse under the flames while sipping the last of your root beer. The firefighters are struggling to get people out. Oh look at the time. The Obama rally is about to start.
Go to the Rally
Elliot said my breakup must have been due to the sweater curse, an unexplained phenomenon where anyone who gives their significant other a hand-knit sweater gets dumped. The only way to break the curse, Elliot said, was to destroy the sweater.
Can't tell a drinking fountain from a urinal? We've got you covered. Brush up on your drinking fountain enthusiast -- or sipper -- vocabulary and learn to talk and swap sips with the best of them.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.