You dump out your shitty fries onto the table, and then meticulously smash them with your fingers while dumping the salt and pepper shakers on top. You slide the tomato and lettuce off your burger and mix them into the flat mess. Once a thick paste is formed, you fashion a pinch-pot, and then fill it with root beer and honey mustard. You smack the shit down onto the table, causing the food to spatter around. A little piece flies into your face. Without thinking, you wipe it into your mouth. Whoa. Delicious. You eat your soup up off the table and floor before going back for seconds. Perhaps, just maybe, you've found nirvana.
You Will Read This Headline. Then You'll Laugh. Then You'll Realize You Were Wrong All Along.
'We’re going to be in trouble!' Little Sister wailed, clutching her favorite book to her chest and sobbing. 'This isn’t fun like a story anymore!' But Big Sister was not listening, she was thinking. She grabbed Little Sister’s book from her and ran into town, yelling 'Help! A book made me and my sister hurt someone!'
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