Well, we met on the Internet and everything was going great. After dinner we went back to his place and he held my eyes open with a couple of those Clockwork Orange clamps and then...nothing...a drizzle at best. It was terrible. He tried drinking a bottled water, some caffeine pills, nothing like the scalding fire hose of eye piss he promised on his bio.
File this one under "Sounded Good at the Time." I have a feeling the instant that jaw goes pop things are going to take a turn.
Did you know that you only use 10% of your brain? You may have heard that before. But what if you could use 100%? YOU CAN!
This is where the excerpt from an article usually goes. Since the content of this update is only intended for cool people, I refuse to place a single word in the path of blundering normal people.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.