Your Himformation Guydes
Our Chugmmander n' chief, Head Bro of the Brouhaha. Partied three years at Texas A&M while pursuing a video game design degree before being forced to drop out for filming babes gettin' they stink on in the co-ed dorm's toilets.
Raised by Ukrainian werewolves in the wilds of LBC, former bowling alley DJ and CEO and founder of the One Eight Eleven Entertainment music empire, $krizzle knows how to party and knows what it means to be a man.
Former WWE Diva and Penthouse Cyber Pet Macy Landing is our sexxxpert on all things hot, horny and bro-less. We really get down and dirty with Miss Man-Hers. She was also the only woman who would agree to work with us.
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Awwwww sh#%! Yo, you can do that like zero times before that sh#% gets on you like a giant pu**y rag draped all over your head and shoulders. It is important to respect your parents. Especially your moms. She do sh#% you can't even consider cont-him-plating when you're 15, like flushing all your pills or trying to get you to quit your mini-bike gang, but you got to recognize that was done for your good, son. Your dad, if he was there for yall that is the most important thing, the sacrifices he made and sh#%, think about that. He livin' through you nigga. All his aspirations and shit. When he dies you carry on the blood. You gonna step away from that shit? Recognize it.
Mangs, don't sweat it. Getting caught up in what your parents did in the past is hella brogus. Live in the now. Find a babe with a nice rack. Put some diesel in your man-tank and rev it up. We create enough freight for ourselves within the context of our own lives. We do a disservice to our loved ones by shouldering their freight too. Would they desire the sacrifices they make in order to free us from responsibility to, in turn, curse us with the millstone of guilt? I don't think so, mangs.
Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.
Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.
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