p0tt3d m3at's ten day forecast calls for record lows.

Punch McRockGroin just wants to get through one day without hating himself. Just one lousy day is all!

RegistrarFagor7 falls in love with every girl that smiles at him. All of them work at checkout counters.

Salsa Shark sometimes tries to swallow food without chewing in hopes that it will choke him to death.

SavoyTruffle reads the newspapers and tries to imagine what his obituary would read like.

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    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

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    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

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