There's so much violence and hatred in the world. That's bad. But dogs are good - they're friendly, and cute. If we could replace all the bad guns with good dogs, well, what would that world even look like? I think it might look a LITTLE something like this:
Republicans announce that all legislation must be voted on at 2am in a secret chamber, with no one but the lobbyists who write the bills seeing a single line of text. Democrats' Response: Stumbling around a field stepping on rakes, handles smashing them directly in their faces every single time.
There is a witch hunt going on right now and I promise you that you will not find any witches in the pleasure room in my congressional office.
For fans of meaningless awards, these awards are extra meaningless.
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