For various reasons, quality submissions from the Something Awful Forum Goons might never make it to the front page. For example, intrepid talents might try valiantly to salvage doomed themes, or a consistently high-quality thread might be too esoteric to attract enough contributors, or something great might just get buried under all the other greatness. This doesn't happen very often, which is why the last Photoshop Phriday Variety Pack ran back in 2005. But there's material to use, and college basketball to watch, so voilà -- the best of the rest!

Last year, Ferrule proposed a few changes that would "make America's often-boring pastime more exciting." Unfortunately, the commissioner's office ignored his suggestions, as well as those from like-minded peers. But now it's Spring Training, when pitchers experiment with weird grips and shitty teams still have stupid hope and anything can happen, so why not institute these upgrades immediately? Our baseball nation turns its yawning eyes to Goons.

Ferrule immortalizes hard-throwing KC Royals pitcher Bruce Chen with this metaphorical representation. Believe it!

Effingham urges everyone to remain calm, and pray for a miracle.

Hungry Bit set the crackers. Then he ate them.

You play a good game, Sir Nose, but the game is finished, now you die.

More Photoshop Phriday

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  • The Fracking Fables of Groggery Gibbonman

    The Fracking Fables of Groggery Gibbonman

    ‘Toad coin?’ wondered the traveler as he examined the pebble. It did not look all that different from any other pebble, and certainly nothing like a coin. ‘What manner of coin has no head or tail, and bears no seal or flag? Who backs this toad coin, the toad bank? The toad treasury!?’ The traveler laughed, but the toads croaked sternly back at him.

  • Your Dog is Totally Worth Refrigerated Food

    Your Dog is Totally Worth Refrigerated Food

    Spending $10-15 a day on perishable organic dog food is not a sign of a decadent culture in terminal decline, it's actually real good and worth it.

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