For various reasons, quality submissions from the Something Awful Forum Goons might never make it to the front page. For example, intrepid talents might try valiantly to salvage doomed themes, or a consistently high-quality thread might be too esoteric to attract enough contributors, or something great might just get buried under all the other greatness. This doesn't happen very often, which is why the last Photoshop Phriday Variety Pack ran back in 2005. But there's material to use, and college basketball to watch, so voilà -- the best of the rest!

Last year, Ferrule proposed a few changes that would "make America's often-boring pastime more exciting." Unfortunately, the commissioner's office ignored his suggestions, as well as those from like-minded peers. But now it's Spring Training, when pitchers experiment with weird grips and shitty teams still have stupid hope and anything can happen, so why not institute these upgrades immediately? Our baseball nation turns its yawning eyes to Goons.

Ferrule immortalizes hard-throwing KC Royals pitcher Bruce Chen with this metaphorical representation. Believe it!


Effingham urges everyone to remain calm, and pray for a miracle.

Hungry Bit set the crackers. Then he ate them.


You play a good game, Sir Nose, but the game is finished, now you die.

More Photoshop Phriday

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  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

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