Much to our surprise, our host stood erect, as if a man himself! He told us that he was the hybrid son of the late Mr. Hands and that he had spent years developing his castle into a place where both man and equine could fulfill their fantasies.

He had some extraordinarily flattering self-portraits, but other than that, seemed to be a pretty good guy. Horse. Guorse. We will call him a guorse.

He was a guorse of good artistic taste, to be sure.

He enjoyed all the modern amenities, from a simulated Sybian... the latest advances in home theater technology.

We were so enamored with his work that he invited us into his true pride and joy: his giftshop.

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