If I were a girl I'd learn the banjo.
She wants you dude.
I'm this fucking close to losing hope in mankind.
And there it goes.
I think our ancestors had something good going when they employed kids at 13-years-old and worked them until they died.
That's all for this week. This is Spokker Jones reporting live and about to take my own life.
Special thanks goes to my FYAD friends CarryTheZero, drudgejr, BillWh0re, Ghost of Fermat, TracerBullet, root, Toxx, Shizuka, zyxio, bbg, olhado, monocular, agenteraser, Myrddin Emrys, Randomphyre, Cpt. Foreskin, and shut for contributing to this report. Do you know of an awful forum that should be included in a future update? Send in a link!
Now stay tuned for a special treat, the FYAD Goldmine!
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
Do you remember the crazy clothes and hair of the 1990s? Do you remember Crystal Pepsi and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Do you remember where you hid the box your mother gave you?
Were you enjoying your day? STOP! There is outrageous crap going on you need to know about!
There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.