If I were a girl I'd learn the banjo.
She wants you dude.
I'm this fucking close to losing hope in mankind.
And there it goes.
I think our ancestors had something good going when they employed kids at 13-years-old and worked them until they died.
That's all for this week. This is Spokker Jones reporting live and about to take my own life.
Special thanks goes to my FYAD friends CarryTheZero, drudgejr, BillWh0re, Ghost of Fermat, TracerBullet, root, Toxx, Shizuka, zyxio, bbg, olhado, monocular, agenteraser, Myrddin Emrys, Randomphyre, Cpt. Foreskin, and shut for contributing to this report. Do you know of an awful forum that should be included in a future update? Send in a link!
Now stay tuned for a special treat, the FYAD Goldmine!
Rock legend David Bowie has changed his identity with almost every album. Can you remember all these classic Bowie characters?
Tucker Carlson's idiot brother just called New York mayor Bill de Blasio's spokeswoman a "LabiaFace."
There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.